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Community Birth Story: Elowen Ada

By Two Rivers Childbirth
May 9, 2014
Birth Stories Project

The HBAHBC of Elowen Ada Goerner (aka Sea Dragon)

As told by Megan:

This story has to start with the hatching of our first daughter, Loki. As much as we wanted a homebirth for her (and us), it was not to be. She entered the world on March 30, 2011 via a cesarean after transferring to a hospital. She was trapped in the special care nursery for 7 days and then I had to return for an additional 5 days for IV antibiotics. It was a long healing process for all. So this experience played a rather large role when deciding future births.

Fast forward 3 years…

Sea Dragon’s labor started during our last Bradley class on Friday, April 4th. We had been lazily timing the contractions and they were about 5 minutes apart and 2 minutes long, but very easy to function through. I would punch Dan in the leg to let him know when another one started. We let our midwife, Nannette, and our doula/birth assistant, Grace, know what was happening. Dan was convinced this was going to be “the night”. He ran around like a crazy man trying to get last minute things done. Loki (our 3 year old) took a nice bath with me. We went to bed and the contractions stopped by 2 am. This ended up being a good thing since my due date/have the same midwife buddy was in labor at the same time and did end up having her daughter on April 5th.

Contractions would come and go over the next 9 days, sometimes at regular intervals for a few hours and sometimes randomly. They were always different feeling, though, than Braxton Hicks. We just kept trying to get ready and keep our birth team up to date with anything new. The full moon was coming on the 15th, and most people were guessing this baby would come then. I was going with 4-14-14, because that is a much cooler date.

Dan was getting ready for work on Monday, April 14th, around 6:30 am. I went in to pee. I immediately felt different. I let Dan go to work (he had been working from home quite a bit for the last week “just in case”). The “different feeling” was much lower and more intense than any other contractions I had had up to that point. By 8 am, they were 10 minutes apart. I updated Grace and Nannette. Nannette was in Frederick for a home visit and Grace was about to head there for an appointment for her daughter. Did I mention Dan works in Frederick?

I called Dan to let him know that we were at 10 minutes apart. We decided that he would come home at lunch if things advanced at all. 20 minutes later, the contractions were now 5 minutes apart. I called Dan to tell him to come home. No answer! I put the dogs outside (where they stayed all day) and opened all of the windows (it was an amazing day). Loki woke up at some point and we ate breakfast together in the recliner watching Jake and the Never Land Pirates.

I finally got Dan on the phone. He was walking to his building. He turned around, sent a quick and blunt email to his work that he would not be in that day, and started the hour trip back home.

I told Nannette and Grace what was happening and Nannette decided she would come to our house from her home visit. Grace decided that her appointment would need to be cancelled when I couldn’t decide if it was really time or not (did I need to poop or birth a baby?). I texted my friend, Kim, to let her know that today was probably the day. (Kim was the amazing friend who was at the last few/many hours of our attempted homebirth of Loki. She drove us to the hospital in the middle of the night in her 2-door car. She may have been a bit traumatized after the last time. She didn’t make in time for this birth, but I think this experience did help heal her after Loki’s birth.) I also texted my friend, Roshontia (who would be Loki’s person during labor), that today could be the day. I attempted to write a message to the amazing women from my Mother Blessing that is was candle lighting time, but I didn’t quite get that far.

Dan got home around 9 am. He knew as soon as he saw me that this time was different. He went to work getting all the last minute things done (like cleaning up after our horrible cats, getting the birth kit out, the table for the birth supplies, and things like that). I got my birth alter ready in the corner of the living room and also sat on the giant ball. I took a hot shower while Dan was running around. It felt awesome. It was nice to feel clean, too.

Grace arrived around 11. I was on the ball and my eyes started tearing as soon as I saw her. I was so relieved that it wasn’t just Dan, Loki, and me anymore. Someone who knew what they were doing!!!!!! Grace was a woman of action! She saw what had been done and what needed to be done. She got the birth supplies out of the bin and organized, got the pool ready in the living room, the bed ready, and I don’t even know what else. Oh, and most important of all- she was being there for me!

Around 11:30, Nannette arrived. Grace had been making sure that I tried to go with the contractions, dropping my jaw and vocalizing. The pool started being filled with water. Nannette suggested a check in baby position and to pee on the way to the bed. I had a slightly bloody wipe after peeing (bye-bye mucus plug). I got on the bed and Nannette asked if she could do a check, and I said whatever she wanted (I knew that after Loki’s labor all of us were wondering how this labor would go). The baby’s position was perfect and I was at 9 cm! (Loki was not in a great position and got stuck during her labor.)

We went back out the living room and got into the pool. It was still a little cool, but I think it helped to slow down labor just a tad for me to catch my breath. Loki got in the pool with me (what a shock that the water loving kid got in the pool!). We realized that we really needed someone for Loki at this point. She would tell me to be quiet and would touch my legs (which I did not want). We tried calling Roshontia again, but there was no answer (found out later that her phone was charging at her desk which she was away from). We (I mean Dan, Grace, and Nannette) started calling people that might be able to come over and that Loki would feel at least a little comfortable with. An amazing mom that we all know with 2 boys of her own that lives 15 minutes away whose husband just happened to be home that day was able to come over. Thank you so much Justine!!!

We moved into the bedroom at some point (maybe around 12:30). Nannette and Grace took turns checking on Loki who was still in her fishy pool watching Jake and the pirates. I was leaning over the end of the bed. I know that my hips were getting squeezed during contractions and that I had totally been pushing (at least a little) during parts of the contractions. It felt better so it seemed like the thing to do. My water broke during this phase. I got Dan’s shoes wet this time instead of Nannette’s (Loki’s labor) and the fluid was clear (unlike with Loki)!!! I laid down on my side on the end of the bed for the next bit of time. Doing what I felt my body was telling me to do. I tried to do the horse lips thing but I just couldn’t. (At some point Justine arrived and I had my team of 3 plus me in our bedroom for the rest of labor.)

The next move was to the birth stool. The birth stool rocked. Dan had installed a shower safety bar in the living room for squatting (I squatted a lot during Loki’s labor and did not want to rely on Dan’s hands, especially when those hands could be doing something else), but it never got used. Nannette pushed our bed as far over as it could go so we would have more room (still ended up being only a 4 foot by 4 foot area in the corner of our room).

I have no idea how long I was on the birth stool. The contractions kept coming and I kept pushing. My voice was gone at this point. I wanted my eyes closed. I wanted to keep pressing/digging my nails into Dan’s arms. I did not want anyone to talk, especially Dan (no desire to hear how great I was doing). I was in my birthing zone. I remember Nannette asking if I wanted to see my baby’s head (No, because I wanted my eyes closed. I would have loved to but it just was not happening at that moment). Nannette asked if I wanted to touch my baby’s head (No, because I would have to let go of Dan). Dan says that I was much funnier with my responses. I will just have to take his word. I did eventually reach down to touch the head. So amazing! (I would have loved to touch the head more and actually see what was happening, but I also know that at the given moment in time it was not possible.) At 1:47, the head was out (the ring of fire that I had heard about was not what I felt, just intense pressure). At 1:48, the body flopped/was guided by Nannette to the chuck pads on the ground under me.

OH MY GOSH!!! I did it! WE DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I reached down to touch our second child. I told Dan that we had another daughter (maybe they saw first but everyone let me find out on my own). I was so beyond amazed. Nannette helped me pick her up and put her on my chest while I was still on the stool. I was holding my slippery little bloody baby that was still attached to me. I was helped to the bed and laid down. Daughter #2 wanted her nipple and made sure that we all knew it. She stayed there, awake, for at least 2 hours.

There was a bit of blood and I was told that I had torn when Sea Dragon made her entrance. My placenta came out at 2:05. It was clamped and Dan cut it. Nannette did a neat little placenta tour for us. Nannette then went to work putting 5 stitches in to fix my speed flap.

Dan and I had not decided on a girl name at this point (we knew the middle name, look up Ada Lovelace). He didn’t like any on my list and hadn’t suggested many alternatives. I had two names I really liked and I asked him when we both super emotional how Elowen Ada sounded. He said he loved it. Post birth baby bliss is a great time to get a name you want.

Elowen measured in at 9 pounds 6 ounces, 23 inches long, and had a 14 inch head. Take that Dr. You Can’t Birth Babies Through Your Vagina!!! (The surgeon that performed my cesarean three years earlier gave the reason for needing it being that the baby didn’t fit through the birth canal; Loki was 8 pounds 3 ounces.)

My mom was the first person I made Dan call. She was in upstate New York, watching my sister’s two daughters (yeah, super timing). She had been calling three times a day to check in. She did call that morning and I told her that it was more of the same (I didn’t know it was really the day yet). She was so shocked when Dan told her she had another granddaughter!

Elowen’s birth was so different from Loki’s birth. It came on strong and fast. There was no time to prepare, no build up. It was a little overwhelming at times, but I never felt like I couldn’t do it, especially knowing that Nannette and Grace were there. It was such an empowering and healing experience. I can’t even say how much it means to me to have been able to have those two amazing women at both of my labors and almost both of my births. I am more grateful than I can say (to Nannette, to Grace, to Dan, to Justine, and to my own body & mind).

(Read Elowen’s big sister’s birth story here)

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.

Community Birth Story: Alexander Miles

By Two Rivers Childbirth
May 4, 2014
Birth Stories Project

As told by Carin:

My labor with my first son, Jasper, was less than ideal. I had an induction (unnecessarily) for possible growth restriction at 39 weeks. My OB ignored my entire birth plan, and I ended up with an epidural and epsiotomy, when I had hoped for a natural birth. So this time I got pregnant, I was determined to do it the way I wanted.

My pregnancy went very well and easy. I met with midwives instead of OBs. I hired a doula, Bergen, in February, which I had wanted with Jasper, but Guy refused. This time he realized how helpful one would be and agreed. I really liked her after our first meeting and was sure she would help me achieve my natural birth.

I continued working up until a few days before I went into labor. At around 36 weeks, I was having contractions if I walked too much. So monday, I called out of work and stayed home to relax. I still had a few minor ones, but nothing serious.

On Tuesday, I lost my mucus plug. I text Bergen and she said that meant we were having a baby sometime but who knew when. Guy and I decided to go for a walk downtown. We walked a few miles, with contractions getting worse and more painful. The last mile back to the car was the worst. I kept telling my husband to just go get the car and come back for me. Once we got back home, the contractions more or less, stopped again. They went back to minor, sporadic occurrences.

I went to my chiropractor appointment that afternoon. I told her that I wouldn’t be back for awhile. For some reason, I knew I was going to go into labor that day. I just knew it. After my appointment, I took a small nap and made dinner. My husband kept telling me that I needed to relax and I wasn’t in labor. So we went to our birth class that evening. I had several contractions each hour during class. Our instructor and my friend, Lindsey was very excited. She thought I was in labor and was so excited about it. She kept saying I was going to have a baby. Finally someone who agreed with me. Bergen had brought her birth bag to class, just in case, but as I clearly was not in full labor yet, we all went to our homes. She told me to relax and that we were going to have a baby some day soon. Apparently she and my husband thought it may be another week or two of this “prodromal” labor.

We got home at 9:30ish that night and I went up to bed, while Guy got on the computer. I was too awake. I still felt like that was the day labor would start, but it was getting late. Jasper woke up and wanted to nurse. So I brought him into our bed to nurse, while playing on my phone. He fell back asleep quickly. All of a sudden I felt my water break. I text Guy and told him to come upstairs. I text Bergen. Guy didn’t respond, so I called him. He answered, saying he would be upstairs for Jasper in a minute, thinking Jasper had just woken up. So I told him my water broke. He was surprised. I told him to call his mom and tell her, in case we needed her soon. Bergen asked about my contractions, which didn’t change. And said to call her when they did. I felt relieved. I had known I was going to go into labor that day, and I was right. I was giddy and awake. But contractions never came, at least not noticeably. I put a towel on the couch and slept in the livingroom.

The next morning, I woke up about 6am. We ate breakfast and went to the grocery store. I hadn’t even gotten a single labor snack that I planned. We got some trail mix to snack on during labor and some things for dinner. Contractions came, but were minor and random. We got home and Guy put together our dinner in the crock pot. Then we called Bergen and I told her I wanted her here, since none of us knew how this labor would go. She got here at 9 and we went to the park again. Walking when leaking water is not a fun experience. At first, I had wanted to stay near the near and not walk too far. But, my contractions were still minor so we decided to walk downtown. We stopped and got some pastries and walked back to the car. Labor was still eluding me.

My contractions were a bit stronger by the time we got to the car, but still minor. We got back to the house and ate, while Bergen had her son dropped off for a bit to nurse. We then decided to do laps around the neighborhood. We also began timing. They were around 6 minutes apart and still getting more intense during walking. We walked around for an hour or two. Contractions were more intense but still not active labor and slowed when I stopped walking.

Around 7, I called my midwife and told her I was in labor. We had to go in for me to receive antibiotics, since I hadn’t been tested for group b strep yet. We got to the hospital around 8. We were taken back to triage and I was checked. I was scared of having no progress in the past 24 hours. I shouldn’t have let the nurse tell me how dilated I was. I was only 2.5 centimeters. I felt very discouraged and tired. I knew if I didn’t kick start labor soon, they would want to intervene. But I wanted a nap so badly.

They started our first monitoring and antibiotics around 9:15. After they were finished, we went for a walk. All of a sudden, things changed. I had to go to the restroom and my contractions were different. I had to stop walking to breathe through them. I was cold. I didn’t realize it but I was finally in active labor.

Around 10:30ish, we had to go back to the room for more monitoring. I stayed on the birth ball, doing wind motions during contractions. I was finally progressing! We finished monitoring around 11. During my contractions, I began to kneel over the birth ball to get through them. I was in the corner, in the dark and in my own little world. My husband went to get a sandwich and my midwife, April, came to check on me and said I was definitely progressing and she would come back later. I started getting very nauseous. I remember telling Bergen that it felt a bit better when I pushed, which scared me. I didn’t think I could be that close to birth already.

My husband came back and I had to go to the bathroom. A contraction hit and I jumped up from the toliet. I held onto my husband and began vomiting. I went back to my corner, while my husband went to tell them I had puked. He came back and immediately left again to tell them I felt like pushing. He came back to me pushing uncontrollably and ran to tell them. I didn’t see anyone come into my room, but I remember them turning the lights on.

I had contractions very close together, pushing each time. April told me I needed to wait to push until they checked me, which wasn’t going to happen. I couldn’t stop. She checked me and I was a 10. Then April asked if I wanted to get on the bed and I said no. So she started pushing things under me, ready to deliver on the floor. They had to call a neonatalogist, since he was preterm. I just remember everyone kept saying “second baby” over and over. I reached down and felt his head, and said that he was coming. I didn’t really feel the “ring of fire” that I had heard about. I had felt a very mild stinging during pushing but it went away before he crowned. I pushed a few more times and felt his head pop out. Another push or two, and his body came out. They counted 30 seconds before clamping his cord and letting my husband cut it.

He was then taken to the neonatalogist and checked over for a little while. I got onto the bed for April to check me for tears. I only had two minor lacerations, much better than an epsiotomy! When I finally got to hold him, I was so overcome with happiness. He was tiny and perfect. He latched on easily.

This birth was everything I had wanted. It was completely natural, from start to finish, save for the antibiotics. My baby got to pick his own birthday, two minutes before midnight! I had an amazingly supportive birth team. Between them and my birth class teachings, I was able to control the pain and remain calm. I loved this birth and hope all to come go as well.

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.

Community Birth Story: Ada Violet

By Two Rivers Childbirth
May 2, 2014
Birth Stories Project

Ada’s Birth Story

My lovely daughter Ada Violet was born on November 15, 2013. She came six days later than her due date, which was fine by me as I had final exams the weekend of her due date and was praying that she’d hold on a little longer! My husband and I had decided before she was even conceived that we would like to have a home birth if possible, so that was the plan. We couldn’t have been happier with the whole process. I’ve never liked going to the doctor, and here was an entire pregnancy where I wouldn’t have to see one doctor or go anywhere further than my living room for prenatal care!

My labor started slowly and gradually. Over the last few weeks I could feel my body preparing for the big event, and a few days before the birth I started having lots of Braxton Hicks contractions, some quite lengthy and uncomfortable. The evening before Ada was born, I could tell there was a change, as the contractions started to become more painful and deliberate. I went to sleep as usual but woke up around midnight to contractions that I couldn’t sleep through. I figured this was probably the early stages of labor, but knew that it might last a while, even days, so I tried my best to rest. I managed to sleep a little between contractions, but by 5 am or so it wasn’t really working anymore. I got up and went downstairs. I didn’t want to wake my husband up because I knew he had work to do that day and also knew that I could manage things by myself at that time but might really need his support later on and wanted him to be well-rested just in case!

I emailed my mother-in-law and texted my mom to let them know I thought labor had started. My mom was planning on being with us for the birth and she and my stepdad were in the car on their way down from Connecticut within what seemed like a few minutes! I just hoped they weren’t going to arrive several days early…

At that point the contractions were still manageable. They weren’t very far apart (every 2 minutes or so), but they would only last 10-20 seconds (where I really had to stop everything and focus). I decided to try to keep myself busy while I could so I made some muffins for breakfast. Fortunately, I managed to eat a couple muffins that morning, as that was the last time I was able to eat until many hours later.

I texted my midwife to give her an update. I told her not to come yet as I was still OK. By mid-morning the contractions were more intense and I was having a hard time doing anything else but focusing on getting through them and resting during the breaks. I went up to the bed and tried to rest while doing my best to time the contractions with the clock (and having a really hard time – later on I learned that they have apps for that!). I was a bit stressed out because my husband had a work deadline that morning and we still hadn’t set up the birth pool yet, and by then I couldn’t do it by myself. Fortunately, he managed to finish his work and set it up before I needed it, but of course you never know what is going to happen until it happens!

By early afternoon I was really focused on getting through the contractions and everything else became a bit fuzzy. My midwife arrived and checked on me, then retreated to a chair and quietly let me labor on my own, which was really nice for me (I think being constantly checked on would have stressed me out and that’s one of the main reasons why I wanted a homebirth). My husband was with me quite a bit in the afternoon, helping me, holding my hand, playing peaceful music on the piano and generally taking care things. I labored in the tub for a while but got out after an hour or so because the contractions were getting really intense with not much space in between and I was started to get tired. At some point my mom and stepdad arrived. I couldn’t greet them properly. It was hurting so bad. I was so happy my mom could be there though. Sometimes you just want your mom, and this was one of those times. She was so great, doing whatever she could to help and putting my mind at ease.

The midwife’s assistant and partner also came at some point, although I have to admit it was all a bit blurry by then. I remember my midwife asking me now and again if I wanted her to check me internally, but I kept refusing. The contractions hurt a lot, but I never felt like I was “making progress” or “opening up” or whatever other terminology they use. I was so afraid I was barely dilated and didn’t want to get hung up on the numbers. At some point she suggested that I drink a small glass of wine and go lie down on the bed to try to rest a bit. I couldn’t accept the wine – I could barely even drink water, I was so nauseated. I did go upstairs to lie down though, and my husband came with me. I was getting so very tired…

The contractions were a bit further apart for a while, so I would start to drift off, only to be brutally awoken by the most intense back pain I’ve ever felt. After a while, I couldn’t take it anymore. I went back downstairs and tried various positions while people took turns pressing on my back during contractions. During the pauses, I sometimes heard the birth team talking quietly together and was afraid they were saying things weren’t going well and that I’d have to go to the hospital. I started getting scared, as our insurance wouldn’t cover the birth and I was starting to think there was no other way but hospitalization, which would leave me traumatized and indebted for life (of course, I’m exaggerating, but this is how I felt!). At the same time, I’m pretty sure at that point that if drugs had been offered, I would have seized the opportunity, despite all prior decisions and thoughts on the matter. I just didn’t know how I was going to go on like this.

I remember seeing the sun set and thinking to myself, “there goes the day.” One whole day gone and I hadn’t even been outside or done anything! At one point I went to the bathroom and I felt some pressure, a new sensation. I decided that my midwife should probably check me. They helped me upstairs to the bed. I’m so glad she only checked me once because it was terribly uncomfortable. She announced “I don’t feel any cervix at all.” “Oh no,” I thought. “I haven’t even started dilating yet and my cervix is so high she can’t even feel it!!” Of course, that’s not at all what she meant. She actually meant that I was fully dilated and could start pushing the baby out. Yay! I wasn’t sure if I had it in me, but at the same time I was so very ready for it to be over.

They helped me into the tub. I tried pushing during contractions but didn’t really know what I was doing. My midwife coached me a bit and at some point I let go of whatever was holding me back and understood what to do. Soon thereafter, my body completely took over and pushed all by itself. It was incredible. I knew I was using the very last of my strength, but I was so close, I just kept going. I pushed until the midwife said she could feel the baby’s head. She told me to feel it too. Then I pushed so hard that I could feel the burning and the sudden relief as the baby’s head came through. Once I knew the head was through my motivation skyrocketed. I didn’t like the thought of the baby’s head in the water for very long (even though I knew there was no risk). With the next push the body popped out and floated up through a cloud of blood and then there she was, my darling baby girl, as beautiful and bright-eyed as could be. I was in shock. It took me several minutes to process what had just happened. After working so hard for so many hours (months really, as the pregnancy wasn’t exactly a cup of tea!), it was all over.

My entourage helped me and Ada out of the pool and onto the couch, where she breastfed for the first time and I held her for half an hour or so until the cord stopped pulsing. I was really uncomfortable because my uterus was cramping and contracting. I went to the bathroom to deliver the placenta over the toilet. I was so surprised when my midwife said I had to push again. I thought I was done! But no, here we go again, and out came the huge placenta and what seemed like gallons of blood (of course it wasn’t really).

After the birth, it took my body a couple of weeks to recover (something I wasn’t expecting), and it took me a couple of months to get used to breastfeeding and living on very little sleep. However, in that time I went from being stunned over the birth of my daughter to totally head-over-heels in love with this little baby girl. Now I can’t imagine my life without her and of course it was all completely worth it. I never knew how much love my heart could contain until Miss Ada was born. I love her to pieces and love being a mom!

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.