community birth stories | Two Rivers Childbirth

Community Birth Story: Joshua

By Two Rivers Childbirth
February 27, 2014
Birth Stories Project

As told by Jessica:

My due date had come and gone. I was afraid I was going to be 42 weeks pregnant before labor started like it did with my daughter. Late Saturday night, December 7, I started having mild contractions. I went outside to speed walk to see if I could keep things coming but they slowed down. I continued to have them throughout the night but was able to sleep through them. They eventually stopped but I knew it had to be soon! We enjoyed our Saturday as a family.

Sunday morning, the 8th, it was snowing! We were expected to get a few inches and some ice. I was excited that maybe today was the day I was going to meet my baby! I kept having contractions on and off throughout the whole day and started to lose my plug. I knew he was going to be come either that night or the next day. I couldn’t decide if I should go to the store, go for a walk to get things going or just stay at home. I decided to stay home because of the snow. I made some soup that I wanted to have after birth, had a dance party with Juliana through my contractions and waited. Juliana and I went out and played in the snow later in the day, it’s a fun memory of being in early labor while making snowangels and forts with her.

Because an ice storm was supposed to hit Sunday night, my Mom came to stay with us. She didn’t want to miss the birth! I put Juliana to bed and I knew it would be the last time before the baby came. I tried to sleep but couldn’t, everything stalled and I got discouraged. I bounced on the yoga ball and ate ice cream (Ben walked up to the store to get me some in the snow and ice!) I went back to bed soon after and the contractions came back stronger after I had slept for about 3 hours. Around midnight, Juliana came over to our bed. Since Juliana has a trundle bed, my Mom was staying in there with her. I said if she wants me then just let her come to my room. I am so glad that she did. It was our last night as a family of three and it seemed fitting and nice to all be together. It was getting difficult to lay still during the contractions and at one point Ben said “are you okay?” or “contractions?” I said yes, they were getting stronger and it was hard to be still. I kept getting onto my hands and knees. Juliana piped up and said “mama, shhh! You woke me up with your talking!” Ben and I laughed, the girl who never sleeps is only disturbed this one time!

I finally decided to get up around 3am. I paced the house and laid down on the couch between contractions trying to get comfortable. They were 10 minutes apart and my midwife Zaina asked me to call her when they were. We chatted on the phone a bit about how I was feeling and she decided to make her way over. It had been sleeting freezing rain for a while at this point so we were a little worried about her making it. She was about 1.5 hours from our house. In the meantime I swayed, paced or tried to rest on the couch. I didn’t want to eat anything but knew that I needed to keep my energy up. I made some peanut butter toast and drank coconut water. It was peaceful laboring in the dim light of my family room, while the rest of the family slept. Zaina got to our house around 5:30 am. We hugged. She checked heart tones and we were just quiet together. I got up and swayed through some of the contractions, tried to rest and Zaina got some rest, too.

Juliana woke up at 6 am. My contractions spaced out a bit after she woke up. I knew that it was common for that to happen so I expected it. Everyone started to wake up, make coffee and breakfast. It was such a relaxed environment of everyone in the kitchen, chatting, excited that we were all going to meet Joshua soon. I had more toast and even tried to drink a cup of coffee because I was afraid if I didn’t I would get a caffeine withdrawal headache while laboring – seems so silly to me now!

Around 9:30 am I retreated to my bedroom and I had Zaina check me. I was hesitant about this at first. I was so afraid she was going to tell me I was at a 2. I also remember being checked in the hospital with Juliana and it being so painful. This wasn’t at all and was easy and fast. Much to my surprise Zaina announced that I could get into the birth pool if I wanted and that I was most defiantly in active labor. She asked if I really wanted to know where I was at and I said yes! Only because she was so enthusiastic I knew I had to be progressing well. I was 6cm. I was excited, I was doing it and almost there! It didn’t even seem hard yet! She also said she felt Joshua’s head and asked if my water had broken already, I said not that I was aware of and she said maybe the bags were just tight around him. Zaina went out to tell Ben to start filling the pool and my Mom called my sister, Amy to tell her to come and she arrived within 30 minutes or so. Amy came into my room and we chatted as I worked though some more contractions. We laughed as I mentioned my plan was to wear my newly bought waterproof mascara, put my hair in a pretty bun and wear my cute labor outfit. My tank top with sweatpants was comfy. I wore no makeup, my hair was down and I had my glasses on.

The pool was ready within 40 min or so and I waited about an hour to get in. I like laboring on land; I had a system down for contractions. I liked standing over my dresser, breathing and swaying through them. Sometimes I would tap my fingers in a rhythm and concentrate on that instead of the waves. I also read my birth affirmations over and over. I finally got in the pool. It felt so nice to have that weight shift off of me for a little bit. My sister brought me cold wash cloths for my head and neck because I started to feel a bit dizzy. I think from the breathing that I was doing to get through the contractions. I was on my knees, just rocking with them. I remember my sister saying, “oh another one already!?” They were getting pretty close.

Juliana came in while I was in the pool and held my hand through some contractions. I cried just because it was the sweetest moment with her. She came in and out of our room throughout the whole labor, danced with me as I swayed, brought me pictures that she colored and just checked on me. I love that girl so very much and can’t imagine her not being present as I labored. I’m so glad that my sister captured some of those moments on our camera.

I decided to get out after about an hour, go to the bathroom and labor on land some more. I liked being able to stand up, sway and wrap my arms around Ben for comfort. I went to the bathroom, stood up and began having contractions on top of each other. I told Ben the contractions just wouldn’t stop coming and I started feeling like I didn’t know what to do or what I wanted or how I wanted to move. Hello transition!! I wrapped my hands around Ben’s neck and just let my body hang, I cried saying I felt pushy and remember feeling scared for a moment. I had an epidural at 7cm when I was in labor with Juliana so the “unknown” frightened me. I knew what it was like to labor, but I didn’t know what pushing or transition would be like. Pushing was automatic and I think the lack of control made me panic. I remember telling Zaina that it “wasn’t the baby, it just HURT” and that I “just needed to go to the bathroom”. But she said ever so calmly, “yeah…., you are going to have your baby”. I thought I was supposed to have this crazy feeling of the baby’s head being “right there!” but I never did – just awesome pressure.

I changed my positions quickly from hanging on Ben, to hands and knees on the bathroom floor, to squatting on the bathroom floor, to on the bed and to finally on the floor, on my knees with my arms wrapped around Ben who was sitting on the yoga ball. I started to push and the baby was having a hard time coming under my pubic bone. Zaina suggested I put one leg up while pushing and I did. I felt him move under the bone and right on down where he needed to be. The immense pressure and POWER of pushing was really intense for me. I screamed for a second, stated I wanted the baby out NOW and even bit Ben’s pants once. I have never felt anything so amazing and overwhelming before. I could hear my sister in the background talking to Juliana telling her that Joshua’s head would come out first; Juliana said she didn’t want to watch but she stayed in the room with the IPAD happily playing a game while I pushed.
The only time I ever thought about an epidural was when I started to push, even before his head was coming out and his shoulders, it was just hard work. I started to wonder why I had even chose this and if I was strong enough. I told myself this is what I wanted, this was the last part and I was done! I heard a “pop” right before he crowned as my water broke. Such a weird sensation! I had my water broken with Juliana’s birth so it was new for me. Zaina was talking to me throughout the whole pushing phase, telling me how great I was doing and when to lower my birthy moans. She told me when the largest part of his head was coming out. I couldn’t even tell! It all felt the same to me; I didn’t have the ring of fire! His head came out in one long push. He made the tiniest cry with just his head being out – so crazy! Ben almost shouted “he cried, did you hear him!?” I think I said again to get the baby out NOW. I was sweating and felt like I was going to pass out from working so hard and that frightened me but I kept telling myself to just breathe. Ben was putting cold wash cloths on my back but soon I didn’t want anything or anyone touching me.

Seven contractions and Joshua was out. Feeling his whole body slip out was the best feeling in the entire world. I had done it, ME!! Little ol’ ME! All I kept saying was “I have a baby!!” and “I can’t believe I actually did it”. Zaina caught him, he started to cry immediately and so did Ben. My mom said “oh Jessica he is perfect!” as soon as he was out, before I even saw him. I flipped myself around and sat down. Zaina handed him to me. After about 2 minutes I realized I took my glasses off when pushing. I asked for them so I could see clearly J. Juliana came quickly over to see him and asked if she could touch him. She grabbed his hand and said “hi baby”. She was so excited to finally meet him. She also went to her room and grabbed her first year picture frame. It has a progression of pictures from her first year. She gave it to me and said ”see, mama , *I* was your baby!!.” She said it as a matter of fact.

It seemed like seconds went by but it has been 10 minutes or so and then Ben cut the cord. At first Zaina asked if Ben wanted to do it and he said no, then Amy grabbed the scissors and was going to do it. It was such a funny conversation of who was going to do it, but in the end Ben cut the cord. I was helped into bed, cleaned up and got all snuggled in while we weighed and measured Joshua. Joshua was 8lbs 6 ounces and 20 inches. He had an apgar score of 9. He latched on right away and has been a nursing champ! I kept shaking for a little but it soon stopped after some coconut water and that yummy soup I made for after birth. Zaina checked me over and I didn’t tear! I was so relieved! Tearing was a big fear of mine. Being home and in my own bed right after birth was the best. So glad that I never had to go anywhere, but stayed in the comfort of our home with my supporting family. I made the right choice for this birth. We all rested and admired our sweet new baby boy.
Throughout labor, I kept waiting for the big contractions. The ones that knock you to the floor, but they never came. I stayed on top of them and in control the entire time. Labor honestly wasn’t that bad or dare I say it, hard. Pushing was the most intense part. It was such a crazy out of this world experience. This birth was amazing, healing from a hard first labor/birth with my daughter and life changing.

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.

Community Birth Story: Loki Helen

By Two Rivers Childbirth
February 18, 2014
Birth Stories Project

Hatching (Homebirth Cesarean) of Loki Helen, remembered by Megan and written 21 months later:

As told by Megan:

I went into labor on Monday morning, March 28, 2011. I had been having Braxton Hicks for most of the second half of pregnancy, but there was something different about these contractions. I noticed them as soon as I woke up and carried around a piece of paper recording the time each contraction started (I didn’t pay any attention to how long each one was). They were 7 to 10 minutes apart pretty much the entire day. I went for a couple of walks to see if they would stop or slow down, but they stayed fairly steady. I tried to relax as much as a first time mom could (sleep was totally out of the question!). I called Dan at work at some point in the afternoon to tell him something was happening but he did not need to come home. We had plans to go to dinner with Dan’s parents and went back and forth about going or not. We decided to go for it and have a meal that left no dirty dishes in our sink. By the time we got home, the contractions were 4 minutes apart.

Dan called my mom to come over (she said she would after watching Bones…he he he). We called our midwife, Nannette, to let her know what had been happening for the last 12+ hours. She said to try to get some rest, maybe try getting in the pool, and to call her again when/if things get more exciting. At some point my mom (with her pup and kitty, Chessie & Finn) arrived. The fishy pool was filled with water and I got in it. It was wonderful! I stayed in that fishy pool all night long. All of our furry children knew something was happening but didn’t really know what. The dogs (Simon, Nubbs, Oz) were very loving to me and just wanted to make sure I was okay. The cats (Giles, Sid, Lesser Evil, Captain Hammer, Evan Taubenfeld, Dr. Horrible) really only wanted warm bodies on which to sleep.

In the morning, Dan and Nannette talked again and decided it was time for the birth team to come on over. We called my friend, Kim. She was going to come over after work (in Baltimore) and was planning on seeing her new niece or nephew. My contractions were pretty much still at 4 minutes apart. Grace (birth assistant and doula) was the first to arrive. She helped me get out of the water and was calming and amazing from the start. Shanna (midwife in training) and Nannette arrived soon after.

So much of the next many hours is a blur, but this is what I can remember… Hip sqeezing was my new best friend. My water breaking around 9:30 am while I was leaning on Nannette in my kitchen. Hearing that there was meconium in the fluid. The only food I wanted to eat was Greek yogurt with honey. Never wanting to have Gatorade again. Trying every position possible. Getting in the pool. Getting out of pool. Getting in the shower. The birth ball in the pool with me. Shanna pouring warm water over my back. Dan behind me in the pool. The concerned look on my mother’s face. Kisses from Oz. Evan Taubenfeld biting the hose to the pool. Evan Taubenfeld biting my toes during contractions. Getting on the toilet. Leaking out amniotic fluid with every contraction.

Around dinner time, I started pushing. Kim arrived bringing snacks and other supplies. She took over picture taking duties and any other little thing (like rubbing Dan’s shoulders while he was rubbing mine). At some point, a cervical check was done, not that I remember what we learned from it. We weren’t sure at one point if my urethra was being pinched and I wasn’t able to pee, so a catheter was put in to drain my bladder, but no pee was to be found. I had started to retain every drop of fluid I drank.

It was getting later and later and later. We were in our bedroom. My mom was (somehow) kind of sleeping on the bed. Dan was on the edge to help hold me. I was squatting on the floor with a stool to rest on between contractions. I remember the discomfort in my legs and feet due to the water retention. There was a hand mirror on the floor under me so my birth team could see what was happening. Nannette could feel my child’s head, but that head was not moving down at all. I had a cervical lip that had to be helped a bit at times by Nannette. Every trick that any of these 3 remarkable women could think of to get this kid to move, but nothing was working. We had to make a decision about transferring to a hospital. I was exhausted to the point of sleeping through massive contractions I should be pushing with. The baby’s vitals and mine were fine, but if there were no changes by midnight (it was probably around 10 or 10:30 at this point) we were going to transfer to Meritus in Hagerstown. I knew that we would not need to transfer so I never packed a bag. I told my mom and Kim pack something to bring with us, just in case we had to go (I learned much later that Dan packed while I was getting dressed to leave).

At 12:30 am on Wednesday, March 20, 2011, the call was made to the hospital that we would be arriving. Shanna help me put some sort of clothing on. I remember being on the couch and hating wearing anything. We had to figure out how to get to the hospital that was about 50 minutes away. There were 3 closer ones, but there was no emergency and Nannette had a good relationship with the midwives on call at Meritus. It was decided that Kim would drive us in her car. Nannette sat up front and Dan stayed in the back with me. Kim’s car has 2 doors so that made getting in and out super fun for me. She had to take lots of stuff out to fit our stuff and Nannette’s gear. Shanna and Grace stayed behind to help clean up a bit with my mom. As much as I wanted and needed my mom to be with me, she had to stay at my house to take care of the herd of critters in our house.

We were hoping so much that the car ride would help this baby be born. We were fine with the side of the road (well, maybe Kim wasn’t so keen on that). It was not meant to be. I pushed with every contraction- there was no way I could not push.

We ended up getting to the hospital around 2 am. Dan checked me in while Nannette stayed with me. I was taken to a larger L&D room and was helped into a lovely hospital gown. I had to have nurses push my hips still. Nannette did the whole history transfer at some point. I was put in a bed, on my back (the first time that I had been in real, true pain) and monitors were attached to check my stubborn child. They seemed quite amazed that everything checked out fine.

Not long after we got in the room, Dan’s parents opened the door. With snacks. Uninvited. In the middle of us making one of the most important choices ever. They were told to not be there (I suppose they went to the waiting room).

They brought in the OB/GYN on call (Dr. Man Surgeon Guy) and he made me lay flat on my back and told me to push to see what I had left. Not much and not nearly enough for him. We were told that a cesarean was pretty much my only option. I asked for a little bit of time. I discussed what options I really had with Nannette. We both knew that if I had to transfer that surgery was most likely going to occur. The decision had been made. Lots of paperwork was brought in for me to sign. About what I did and did not want (like vitamin K shot and eye goo). Dan was given his instructions.

I was rolled into the super bright and freezing cold operating room just before 3 am. The anesthesiologist sat me up to give me my spinal. I had to make sure he waited until after a contraction (still pushing with every one). For the first time in what seemed like a very long time, I was not overwhelmed but totally numb. I was laid down and the curtain to prevent me from seeing anything was put up.

Dan was allowed in. The surgeon came in. Dan asked if he could take pictures and was told that he could. It began. I was cut open along my lower abdomen. The surgeon put his hands in to pull out my baby and she/he was stuck! My child had wedged itself and the doctor had to yank and grunted while he did it. I could see my whole body being tugged. It was such an incredibly odd thing to see. The head was slightly squished from being stuck.

My baby eventually came out. My baby was a little girl! And she came out pooping. Everywhere. She cried and then stopped. She aspirated meconium. They whisked her away to resuscitate her. I had no idea what was happening. Informing the mom was not on the to do list. She was eventually bundled up and brought over for the standard immobile-mom kiss on the forehead. She was then taken away to the Special Care Nursery. Dan was to stay with her and so he followed our new daughter. Nannette was waiting for us when I finally got out of recovery a few hours later.

Loki Helen Goerner was hatched on March 30, 2011 at 3:13 am. She was 9 pounds 3 ounces and 20.5 inches long. She stayed in the Special Care Nursery for 7 long days. I was able to hold her for the first time when she was about 7 hours old. She nursed like a champ when tubes in her mouth were finally removed and every time after.

I wish her birth could have been different, but this was how she needed to come into the world. My labor was amazing. Shanna and Grace (who was pregnant) and Nannette (who was also pregnant) are to thank for that. I will treasure what they helped me to experience forever.

(Read Loki’s little sister’s HBAC birth story here)

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.

Community Birth Story: Aaron Matthais

By Two Rivers Childbirth
February 7, 2014
Birth Stories Project

As told by Jessica:

My husband Spencer and I learned we were expecting our first child in the Spring of 2013. We had been trying off and on for years, and had nearly given up hope. I managed to keep my pregnancy a secret from Spencer for over a week. Over a nice dinner out, I finally alerted him that, “Our love has a life of its own now!”

The next several months passed quickly and our anticipation steadily grew. In the summer, on our routine 20 week ultrasound, we found out we were expecting a boy–which my husband had already proclaimed with conviction from the moment I broke the news. We had already been referring to my growing bump as “he”!

It was an uneventful, naturally progressing pregnancy. As both a glutton for knowledge and at times a somewhat anxious person, I read everything I could get my hands on about pregnancy and labor and delivery. I talked to everyone I knew who was “in the know”. I wanted to be mentally prepared for anything. I also wanted to know the “right” things to do to give my baby the best start.
There was never any question that I wanted a natural, vaginal birth with as little intervention as possible, though I’ve always felt most comfortable with the hospital setting, just in case. I made a birth plan to make sure my wishes were known and followed when possible—everything flexible of course for the health of me and baby. I also obtained the service of a birth doula, Natalie, who was an invaluable resource both prenatally and for the birth.

My original due date was December 12, 2013. Two days earlier, I had contractions that I though for sure would progress since I hadn’t had any false contractions and they lasted all night into mid-morning. But then they stopped dead. The same thing happened every couple days or so for the next several days, so I stopped getting excited about it. By this time I was very ready to get the baby out!
I was getting more and more nervous as the days went by, as the hospital and obstetric practice I used has a policy of inducing labor at 41 weeks. I knew inducing increased your likelihood of a Cesarean section—which was my biggest fear. I was scheduled for a fetal stress test and ultrasound to make sure everything was still alright on December 23.

Fortunately, on December 18th at 8:53pm, my water broke in a gush in my driveway as I got home from a local church function. As someone who likes to have expectations, I was not expecting that at all! I called my healthcare provider and my doula, and then sent a text to my husband to come straight home from taking his last law school final of the semester (which he amazingly finished also at 8:53pm). The plan was to head to the hospital to ensure my membranes had ruptured and to put me on a monitor to see if I was having contractions—if so, they would then admit me and our doula would meet us there.

I felt no contractions, so I was surprised when they hooked me up and alerted me that I was indeed having contractions, and that they were already 3-4 minutes apart. What I felt at that point had been going on for at least 3 weeks and wasn’t even as intense as menstrual cramps! I was only 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced however, and 4 weeks prior I had already been 1 ½ cm dilated. I was very disappointed, thinking that this meant I’d have a long labor.

Our doula, Natalie, arrived shortly after. She and my husband and I walked the halls of the hospital labor and delivery ward till about 2:30am on December 19, interrupted only briefly by a deceleration on the baby’s intermittent monitoring at 1:00am. I was given two bags of IV fluids and monitored while side-lying for 15 minutes while they made sure the baby was ok; and gratefully he was.
My contractions had ramped up quickly and steadily since I was admitted shortly after 11:00pm. By 2:30am, I didn’t really want to swap stories with Spencer and Natalie anymore, and walking was no longer pleasant. I switched to laboring on the birth ball until about 3:30am. I had been avoiding getting rechecked because I was afraid with how little dilated I was at admittance that I would be progressing slowly; I didn’t want to be disheartened by the information. So I was thrilled to find I had from 11:00pm to 3:30am progressed to 7 cm and 75% effaced, -2 station! The time I spent from 7 to 9 cm dilation was only 29 minutes, but it was definitely the most intense. I spent this time in the hospital’s shower, with Natalie using the handheld shower head to direct the hot water over my pelvis where the contractions were most intense. All the while she recited Catholic prayers, which served to bring me comfort and ground me even more, though I was so overtaken with the contractions that I couldn’t participate in reciting them myself. I felt I had to mentally and spiritually pull into myself to get through it—it was all I could do to even barely open my eyes, the pain was so intense.

During this time of transition, I became very vocal, and stayed such for the rest of my labor. The nurses rushed in concerned I was pushing in the shower. When they asked me if I felt like pushing, the best I could answer was, “I don’t know. I don’t know.” They compelled me to get out of the shower, into the bed, and they rechecked me—9 cm dilated, 100% effaced, and +1 station! The obstetrician then came in and alerted us I was actually at full dilation except for a small section of the right side of my cervix. Until that last bit thinned, she told me I had to delay pushing or else risk rupturing my cervix. I spent 40 grueling minutes at this stage—the period of rest that some people have between transition and pushing did not happen for me. I had to pant through contraction after contraction, and I locked all my attention and energy on my doula and her instructions. The doctor had left temporarily and came back when I finally had had enough. I rarely use profanity, but I shouted in simultaneous anger and desperation to the nurses to, “Go get the damn doctor—I need to push!”
That inner lip was still there when the doctor came in a minute or so later, but thankfully she was able to manually move it out of the baby’s way. Finally I could push! As I had heard, pushing wasn’t nearly as intense as transition; I’m sure part of it is knowing the crowning glory (pun intended) of labor is near! It was at that time 4:57am.

Spencer and I’s son, Aaron Matthias, came quickly after that, and was born only 48 minutes later at 5:45am. I did end up getting an episiotomy, because his head was larger than we expected. I hear it never goes completely as expected though, so it’s ok! I did get to have my desired natural vaginal birth, my rite of passage into motherhood. Not to mention a beautiful new baby, who was a very healthy 8lb 7oz at 20 inches long!

I got to hold Aaron immediately skin to skin. I was so happy I was crying tears of joy and laughing at the same time! Spencer was as proud as I’ve ever seen him. We both spent that first hour just enamored with our son–the new soul God allowed and entrusted us to bring into the world. I’m so grateful for the support that I had throughout the pregnancy and labor and delivery from all the healthcare providers involved and especially from my husband, family, friends, and my doula. I strongly believe they all were vital for the positive birth experience I had, and for setting the tone for Spencer and I to have the best beginning possible with our son.

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Click HERE to learn more about the Community Birth Stories Project or to submit your own birth story.